"Success is not in our achievements, it is not in our not failing, it is not in our perfect record of being this or doing that, of having more or getting "there" that pot of gold at the end of the rainbow that we are always chasing, but rather success is life itself. It is the ability to make the most of what we have been given, the grace to accept our failures, ourselves, for who we are, faults and all, and realize that life can be enjoyable when we live our lives as honest, and as best we can. Yes, we are going to fail, things will not turn out the way we wish, there will be disappointments and set backs, but ultimately, life is worth living. Life is worth living when you know and remind yourself that your life counts, you might not think it does, but in God's eyes, in the eyes of someone else, it does. It means more than you will ever know. You may never see it, but others do, I believe that. Sometimes we focus so much on the bad in our lives, the areas that need improvement, and we forget to see that good in our hearts, the good that has been done through our words and actions. I don't think God looks at our faults and says, "Why can't you do better?" or "What is wrong with you?" Rather, Father God in heaven is so proud of our hearts, He really is, I believe this with everything in me, I have to, or He wouldn't be a good God to believe in. Every now and then I get down on myself, I feel like I've failed others, I haven't done enough, or I made and make too many mistakes and I've sacrificed all for nothing, the enemy would want me to think this way, to feel like I didn't measure up, that I'm not good enough for the people that I love and care for or I haven't done enough for God and His kingdom. "

i happened to read Jaeson Ma's blog today, well...somehow this matches my thoughts... I found that i indulge myself in thinking myself too much, too much, today heard the talk from "wang yan long", and i think i have to re-think about the idea one idea i had last term...to tune my focus back, and still pray too less...